I'M ANGRY

I'm angry with life
It has been mean to me and family the past 8 years
It presents less happiness more sadness every year

I'm angry with people
They hurt the weak ones and support the powerful but evil ones
They are so selfish, arrogant and ignorant it makes me sick

I'm angry with you
For not understanding how I feel
For judging me from my appearance and wealth
For ignoring me
For being happy

I'm angry with God
For making my parents suffer with their illness
How can he or she or whatever it is do that to the most incredible parents I have ever had
They were the kindest people I have known
They helped the ones needed help
They took care of others with love and respect
They were the kind of people who taught me  to treat people equally
To respect others
To treat people the way I wanna be treated

But most of all,
I'm angry with me
I hate that I can not be the person mynparents are proud of
I hate that I can't provide them with things they need
I hate that I can't take care of them myself under the same roof
I hate that I can't give the happiness they deserve to have
I hate me

Before Sleep

Wow, it's been a very long time since I posted something here. But, here I am again.

So, what's been going on in my life? Well, life. So many things have happened. Good, bad, amazing, frustrating, exciting, boring things. Basically everything. And I just haven't had the time and energy to write them down and post them in my blog. Until today.

This afternoon, when I was at work and reading something, I got this urge to express the things that have been going on in my head. And since I'm not an expressive nor a talkative person, what better way to do it than writing. And then I remember I still have this blog hanging around somewhere on the internet. But, I do need a quiet place to do it. So I waited until I got home. And again, here I am.

So, I have a question for those who read this. What do you usually do before you go to sleep? Most of you would probably answer reading a book, watching TV or movies, listening to music, browsing the internet, playing with your phone or other gadgets. Well, don't get me wrong, I do those things too. I love the internet, I love music, I love reading, I love playing games, which mostly I do before sleep or in my past time. But there's another activity that I've been doing before sleep that started almost two years ago. Watching my mom sleep.

Wait, what? Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I sleep in the same room, in the same bed with mom. It all started almost two years ago, when she had a stroke.

You see, I used to sleep upstairs, in my own room. After she got home from the hospital, I still slept there for a period of time. Then, one time she got really sick, and got me so worried. So, I thought, I should be close to her while she sleep in case something happen (hopefully nothing bad will happen). From then on I stay close to her just to accompany her.


The watching her sleep habit began right after that. I guess if I want to analyze it, it is caused by me being paranoid of her health. You see, I'm an only child. I still have both of my parents. But my dad doesn't live with us anymore due to his health problem. But we still visit him twice a month or so. That left my mom and me at home.

For those who have siblings, let me tell you how lucky you are. Because even though you don't have your parents anymore, you will still have each other. Not me though. Being an only child, with no husband or kids yet, if something happen to them (God forbids), I'll be left alone.

My parents are my world. I'd do anything to make them happy. They're my rocks,  my strength, my guidance. To be honest, I don't know what I would do without them in my life. I would probably go insane.

So, here I am sitting on the bed, writing this. Occasionally glancing to my left, where my mom sleeps. Watching her, checking her.... breathing...

Just Another Ordinary Day

It was just an ordinary Friday. Nothing interesting happened. So, I'm not going to write much. I'm just going to post pictures of my students during their library visit. They just looked so adorable, acting so serious while writing a review of the book they were reading.

As usual (since this term, anyway) I have a class at 2 PM. So, I went to teach until 3.15, then told my students to go to the library. It was our Library Visit day. We stayed there until the break. Nothing special happened. And the students were rather excited, because after the break we were going to watch a movie.

My EC-5A Students

 In short, the class finished around 5.35 pm.

It was pouring outside. But, my girls and I went to MKG anyway. We had dinner and chatted about our plan to Bandung next week. Now, THIS is going to be a great fun. We keep counting the days until next Saturday. Maybe later, I will have a new, exciting story to share here.

Back Again

Hi all...

WOW! I'd just realized that it has been a year since I wrote the last post on this humble page of mine... Time sure flies. That means, it has also been a year I become an EFL teacher.

There are lots of things happened during my "sleeping" state. Bad, good, sad, and happy moments came and went into and out of my life. And where did those experiences leave me? Well, I'm still my dear simple self. Nothing changes much.

Okay, since it's my "first" time writing again since last year, I won't say too much. Just wanna say "hi again" and that "I'm back". Hopefully, I can write more often from this day forward.

Love,
Me :)

UNIQUE FOOD: BIRD’S NEST

Bird's Nest Soup

As you know, bird’s nest is where the birds live in. Mostly, it is made by twigs, dry grass or mud collected and put on a branch of a tree by the birds. But this particular bird’s nest is not made of those materials . It's the nest of swallow or swiftlet birds (Collocalia Fuciphaga).

The swallows, which can only be found in the tropical coastal areas, usually live in dark caves. They make their nests from strands of their gummy saliva, which hardens when exposed to air. The nests are built by the male swallows during the breeding season over a period of 35 days. The shape is similar to a shallow cup and stuck to the cave wall.

The bird’s nests have been consumed in China as a delicacy for centuries. They are usually cooked into the all-known bird’s nest soup (yan wo). In Chinese tradition the nests are believed to be beneficial for human health. Many classical Chinese books, that highlighted on health food, mentioned that swallow’s nest was imported by the Chinese from the Southeast Asian Region since the Tang Dynasty (A.D. 618-907). This fact was also written by Joseph Needham in his book ‘Science and Civilization in China’, Book 3 Volume 4.

In Southeast Asian countries such as Vietnam, Thailand, Malaysia, and Indonesia, the swallow’s nests are quite a big industry. For example in Indonesia, where the swallow or swiftlet birds are known as “walet”. The swallow’s nests produced in Indonesia are known to be ones with the finest qualities in the world. In the country, most of the bird’s nest merchants have started to raise and breed the birds in house-like structures. Shelters are built to attract wild swallows or swiftlets to build nests inside them. These “house nests” are said to have much lower price compared to the “cave nests”.

There are several kinds of swallow’s nests traded in the international market. They are white nest, yellow nest, and the blood-red nest. However there are rumors of a rare type of swallow’s nest exists in Indonesia which only harvested on the island of Flores. It is said that it has the color of blue. Because of its rarity, this  type of nest is sold in price about five times higher than the white nest which already considered to be the best quality.

Consuming the swallow’s nests is claimed to be very beneficial for humans' health. The nests are claimed rich with protein, calcium, iron, amino acid, and other nutrients. There are about 65% of proteins contained in it. Other substances included are moisture (10%), traces of fat (23.3%), and carbohydrates (0.8%). There are about 6% of amino acids contained in the swallow’s nest also.

Due to the amount of nutrients, consuming the nests has the benefits of stimulating the regeneration of cells, enhancing cell-mediated immunity, increasing the resistance of an individual to X-irradiated damage, strengthening the functionality of heart, and replenishing strength and vital energy. For women, consuming the swallow’s nests is believed to be good for rejuvenating, restoring youthfulness and ensuring the glowing and wrinkle-free complexion.

Unfortunately, the high demand on the nests is risking the existence of the particular species of the birds. Many scientists, have been quite concerned with the rapid disappearing of the swallow or swiftlet birds. They have found the reality in some of the caves where the birds usually nesting. The walls in those caves are completely abandoned. They could only find the rotted bamboo scaffolding left by the harvesters. Unfortunately, this does not stop the harvesters from following the birds to their new homes, so they can take more precious nests to sell in the market.

* Gathered from many sources.

* All pictures belong to their rightful owners. I'm just borrowing them.